Love Letters: A letter to my daughter

Dear Ananda,

1. Life is not perfect, and it is not fair, but it is up to you to sink or swim. At the end of the day, your life is what you make it.

2. It's not always easy. Sometimes life will seem like a huge mountain that seems impossible to climb. Remember, it's not a race. One step at a time. You'll get there.

3. You'll hurt people. It's inevitable. It's not a good feeling and it might get messy, but you are human. Apologize and do better next time.You'll get hurt. Don't let this make you jaded and angry at the world. Allow yourself to weep. Give yourself time to be miserable. Then pick yourself up and move on.

4. You can't control everything. As much as you'd like everything to go your way, it just doesn't work like that. You can roll the dice and wait for the outcome. Stop trying to manipulate everything to suit you. You can't control how other people will react to things.

5. Be yourself. There's no one more beautiful than a person who knows her ins and outs and loves every bit of it. It might take awhile, but when that day comes, you'll feel so liberated.

6. Stand up for something. Your thoughts matter. Your opinion matters. If something is important to you, say so. Fight for it. Defend it with every last drop you have.

7. Travel as much as you can. Keep an open mind. Not every place is the same as home but that's what makes it great. Try different kinds of food, even those that sound or look weird. More than the tourist sights, learn more about the local culture. Talk to people.

8. Be careful with your heart. Don't give it to just anyone. Somebody will break your heart. Make sure he's worth it. You will break someone's heart. Make sure it's for the right reasons. Don't do anything you feel uncomfortable doing. If he can't accept you for who you are, walk away. If he hurts you physically or verbally, walk away. If he doesn't want you, don't run after him. You deserve better.

9. Spend your money wisely. No you don't need that designer bag that costs as much as your rent. You don't "need" many things. Purchase things that will last you a long time. Use your money to travel. Learn a new language. Take culinary classes. Spend on things that will teach you a skill or develop your interests.

10. Be kind- to yourself and to others. Everyone is going through their own struggle. Everyone deserves compassion. Get both sides of the story. Forgive. The worst feeling is to have hate in your heart.

It won't always be easy, but it will be worth it. I promise.

Love, Mom