The thing about emotional landmines, much like actual ones, is that we more often than not don't know that they are there. Sometimes, you may see something that triggers these awful feelings in you and you can't understand why, because it's something that you technically got over and moved on from, so why on earth are you crying or angry right now? Why do certain songs affect us? Why are we averse to certain places? Why do certain situations make us feel uneasy? Emotional Landmines. We are filled with them, and sometimes all we need is something tiny to trigger a rush of emotions we didn't think existed anymore.
Does hurt every completely go away? I think it can but it takes a lot of time and effort to process experiences and situations before it does. More often than not, a small part of it manages to superglue itself to some far corner of your heart and decides to come out unexpectedly from time to time. These emotional landmines aren't always on- the- floor- for- days dramatic, sometimes it can be in the form of a stomach flip or a sudden jolt and jelly legs. Sometimes it can be in the form of a reaction to a certain situation that others may see as over-reactive, others it can be feelings of panic. We all have baggage. Every single one of us. Unfortunately.
For the most part, I think I've been good about letting go of emotional baggage. I talk a lot, I write a lot, and I've always had the most awesome support system- that definitely helps. I usually go through a long period of not knowing what to do with myself, and then, I'm through. Over. Done with it, but admittedly, there are certain things that I don't realize are still lingering in the outskirts of my memory that take me by surprise sometimes. I think many times our panicked rush to move on as quickly as possible makes it hard to completely settle things that we need to in order to completely be free from it. For instance, replacing a loved one with someone else immediately after a break up is unfair to both you and this new person, because aside from your future issues, you will be dumping all your past, unresolved issues on that person. And one day, you may react violently to a certain comment or action, taking your partner by surprise. That's just one example out of many and it doesn't even have to be about romantic relationships all the time. Sometimes it can be about the death of a friend, or a particular jarring experience that you tried to bury but just won't quit.
Whatever it is we go through in life, I guess we just need to remember that nothing lasts forever, not even the aftermath of painful experiences, but only if you allow yourself time to process and patience to slip and fall once in awhile. Growing, changing, moving forward- all are life-long processes. Each situation you go through is only one leg of the marathon, and if one part cripples you and you don't give it ample time it needs to heal, then the rest of your run will be difficult as well. Be patient, be kind, to yourself and to everyone around you, for everyone is indeed fighting a hard battle, and these scars, we carry with us for life. Now, the question is--> will these scars always be a burden and a reminder of all the shitty things that ever happened to you, or will you wear them like a badge of honor, for being able to go through all that, survive all of it, and still embrace life?
Emotional Landmines will always be there, but it's really up to you to sink or swim.
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